The First time
by Lady Bellatrix Black Lestrange
Summary: The first time Bellatrix and Narcissa cross the bridge from sisterhood to lovers.


The first time.

I remember the first time she touched me. The first time I released that she loved me more then just a sister, that she wanted me the same way that I wanted her. I recall every second of that night, the smell, the sounds the heat and the passion and most of all the love. Her love for me, so intense, so powerful, I could feel it touch me, like a physical thing. She wrapped it around me like a safety blanket, covering me in warmth and protection. And even though the years have passed, and such terrible things have befallen me and my beloved sister, the love, now, is still the same. If not stronger than before.

That first night we made love, will be embedded in my mind for the rest of my life. Even though there has been many other nights, and days, and lazy mornings and hot afternoons, the first time is the one that is the most special to me. Not only did my Cissy give me her innocence that night, but she also gave me something no other person had, or would ever give me. She gave me peace.

I have always had a troubled mind. As long as I can remember, my thoughts where always whirling. My mind never settling, even when I slept my over active brain was screaming at me. I'm allowed no rest from my own self, my own emotions threaten to drown me. I have so many of them all in one go that I can't grasp which one I should be feeling at that time. And most of the time I get it wrong, so I stopped. I became a blank expression for the rest of the world, except for my Cissy. For her I would cry, for her I would laugh, for her I would lay bare my soul, and she never judged me, no did she turn away from me, even in my darkest moments.

Only in her arms was I at peace with the world and with myself. In her arms I was content and safe, our hearts beating together as one. No one would harm her as I was there to protect her with my wand and my fury. The other students in the halls and corridors of Hogwarts, would part like the red sea when the Black sisters walked though the ancient castle. We where untouchable, out of reach of all but each other. I was the black orchid, she was the white rose.

That night was magic. That night was the start of our heaven, a heaven that we still have and live in with each other. I remember her coming to me in my dorm. The other girls where asleep, it was late and all was silent in the Slytherin Common downstairs. I heard her bare feet upon the wooden floor as she padded towards my bed, the rustle of the thick velvet curtains begin pulled back and her weight on my bed as she climbed in beneath the covers with me. I did'nt open my eyes as she pushed her slender body up against my slightly curver one. It wasnt the first time she had got into my bed at school. And it was a regular thing at home in the winter when it was cold and she would leave her own cold bed and seek warmth in mine. So I stayed "asleep".

I remember her hands on my on my shoulders, they where warm and soft, and slightly trembling. I opened my own dark eyes and met her light ones, and my breathe hitched in my throat as I saw the lust swimming in her ice blue orbs. I didnt speak, I couldnt speak, my heart hammered as her one hand touched my cheek, the other sliding down over my side, she lingered on my hip, gently caressing it through the lace of my over sexy night shirt. She leaned closer, her pale pink lips inches from my rosier ones. I couldnt breathe, as she brushed her lips lightly over mine, a whisper of my name, escaping her own. Her hand no longer on my hip, but trailing up my thigh, instinctively, I parted my legs for her. She smirked as I did so, her nimble fingers tracing my core through my black underwear, I was trembling with a thousand emotions and feelings assaulting my body all at once.

This wasnt the first time I had been touched in sexual way. Even though it is tradition for a pureblood woman to be a virgin on her wedding night, my father had taken mine from me a year before on my sixteenth birthday. And Rodolphus, my future husband had made sure any trace of my virginal qualities had been wiped from both my body and my mind. He was never a gentle man.

Her fingers stroked me through the lace, and I shuddered as the heat rose up in me, making me more and more ready for her to touch me. I breathed her name and she slipped her long fingers under the lace and inside me. It was in that moment that I knew I would never be the same again. It was in that moment that for the first time in my life, I felt whole, complete and at total peace. My hands shock as I dragged them down her back, my hips moved with her hand. She touched me expertly, like it was my own hand inside me, knowing where to touch, knowing what to do. She kept her eyes on my face as she thrust into me with her fingers, and I for the first time being under another person, kept my eyes open. I didnt need to close them to see her, she was there, she was touching me, making love to me, pushing me closer and closer to the edge of the river in which I was willing to gladly drown in as long as it was her hand taking me there.

And she did, she pushed me into the dark waters, and I went under. I drowned in her sight and her smell and her love for me. I whispered her name as she caught my moans in her mouth, her tongue dancing over mine, her lips moving gently as she told me over and over again I was hers, and I was beautiful, and she loved me.

As softly as I could, I pushed her onto her back, my eyes still locked on hers. She looked like an angel, all light and goodness. I kissed her slowly and gently, my hands running up and down her body. She gasped as I cupped her small, firm breasts, and she arched her back, pushing herself into my hands. I sat on my knees between her legs, the white silk of her nightie covering her perfect body from my greedy eyes. In one swift motion, it was over her head and she lay bare before me. It was my turn to smirk at her lack of underwear. She panted and silently begged me to touch her, and I looked down at her, my lips slightly parted, the strap of my black lace nightie falling from my shoulder. She was my prey now, and I was the predator. She was mine to devour, mine to savor and mine to taste.

And I took it all, all of her she gave to me that night. Her whimpers, her moans, her tears and her blood. I remember my heart aching for her as I pushed my fingers inside her as gently as I could. Her cry of pain ringing in my ears. I kissed her tenderly, keeping my fingers still inside her, letting get used to the feel of it. After a few moments, her hips began to thrust onto my waiting hand. I moaned with her, she felt perfect, like silk, soft and smooth, her innocence covering my fingers.

I held her tightly against me after she had returned from the river that she had sent me not an hour before. She smiled against my neck as she kissed my hot skin, telling me I was hers, and she was mine, always and forever, she would always be mine. I told her my heart was hers, and it always had been, and always would be.

The peace I felt that night I still feel today as I look down at my Cissy asleep by my side. We are older and more scared now then we where that night. More than two decades have passed, and she has gotten more beautiful with each passing year. I have fallen deeper into the darkness that threatens to consume me. My body is now as scared as my mind. Years in Azkaban showing on my milky skin. Years of being snatched away from my one source of light and love has pushed me closer than I've ever been towards the abyss. Sometimes my own darkness frightens me. But then, I look down and I see her next to me, I feel her push herself closer to me, slipping her hand in mine in her sleep.

She touches her soft lips to mine and whispers she loves me. Her hands still take me to the river, over and over and over. Her tongue and her teeth take me to my own bit of paradise. And in her arms, I am still in heaven.


End file.
